I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
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