idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
Alive.
So much puke
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
we were clicking our heels together saying theres no place like home, while the cops were tellin us to call our parents and tell them what happened.
Randomize
