If i come over, it means nothing
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
I just need some breakup sex yanno like filthy wish fulfilling breakup sex to make me forget what I never had
That bitch claimed that you said it was ok if she drank your vodka. Obviously she has never met you
Randomize
