I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Randomize
