yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
That blackeyed peas song was on, so I thought that was prediciting tonight was going to be a good night. And then my garage door opner fell and hit me in the head.
I literally just copy and pasted that from another bbm convo bc I'm far too stoned to explain that again.
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
