what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
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