i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
You were eating microwaved pad thai out of a solo cup with a pair of scissors....
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
Randomize
