it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
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We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
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Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.