yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
Well I just put wine in my tea
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
