i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
Hey had an urgent voicemail from the Illinois national guard....have you been using my identity for your blackout weekend?
Yes and yes
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shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just woke up and currently drinking copious amounts of eggnog straight from the carton to replenish the electrolytes lost last night
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
But that's fine. Because I am an independent woman who is going to pull some jane Goodall shit and save the world one day......or be a porn star......either way they are going to wish they had fucked me.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
I only live four blocks from the bar but when you're hammered this walk feels like the journey through Mordor.
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