She's JV to your varsity
Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
Randomize
