i was rollin on her like bob the builder
I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
hung over. covered in somebodies makeup. and ready to drink.
stumbled upon a picture of an owl staring me in the face. i almost offered him a bong hit.
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
Can you please reassure him im not a scary or intimidating person? And that really my entire life is a series of completely ridiculous events that have led me here?
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize