I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
Remember when I was so high that I thought my appendix burst? All I had to do was fart man, just fart.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
What do you think french fries on pizza would taste like?
i already know. Delicious. Use ranch.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
Terrible idea I love it
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
Also, you think turning 23 is bad, I just ran into the guy that gave my chlymidia
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
Randomize
