dear santa what can i do with your candy cane?
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Randomize
