Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
my Prof for my bio lab has his lab coat collar popped. it's 8 am and im too hungover for this guy
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
I seriously think the toilet is the cleanest thing in their house. At least if I have to worry its not about that.
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
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