Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
Threesomes are not as fun as you'd think. I left with a black eye and I'm not sure who's to blame.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
