Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Would I be crazy if I drove 1,000 miles for some dick? What mile does it become ridiculous?
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
Your parents are gone and we haven't fucked in their bed... why?
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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