Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
I feel like you're the reason public nudity is illegal and generally frowned upon in society
having flashbacks of licking salt of your dick for my shot of tequila
My Sexting was not on an AP level
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
Randomize
