with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
I just remember making out with this kid's friend, washing blood off my hands and hearing the RA's were looking for me.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
Haha, how do I word that nicely? "You got me to the edge of no return twice and failed to let me orgasm, therefore you owe me chicken nuggets or hot wings. Your decision"
Me: I shouldn't go to the airport bar it's too expensive and I don't need it. Dark me: SHOTS AT 7 AM
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
