I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
I had to dust off the condom box before she came over..
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
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