Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
Was finally able to jerk off without the motion giving me a migraine. Think my hangover's getting better.
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
I guess there's no delicate way to say "I'm 90% sure I sucked his dick in the bathroom of the bar."
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Randomize
