i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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