How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Randomize
