Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
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