well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
I threw up soo much that I started crying. Then his grandma randomly came in and started rubbing my back...
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