I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
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