bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Why are my keys in the refrigerator?
You said "This is gonna really confuse me tomorrow." Apparently drunk you plays pranks on hungover you.
This explains so much.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
Somehow he made it really romantic
He came on your tits... That doesn't scream romance to me.
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
This is my life. Enjoy the view
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
So i had a lucid dream about blowing myself. This is why people love me
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Randomize
