So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
the australian girl literally just drank an entire pitcher of beer in about twenty seconds. i want to go to there.
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
