Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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