the truckdriver in the lane next to me just looked down and motorboated in my direction.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Saxophones in my mind. I swear someone dosed me.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
