Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
someone put bongwater in my humidifier again THIS NEEDS TO STOP
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize
