fuck, i never want to drink again I drunk dialed matt last night and broke up with him the second night in a row. FUCK QUADFEST
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
When I found out he was circumcised I called his mother and thanked her
Randomize
