You screamed 'pound me, you big thick stud.' I looked around for porn cameras.
Shut up. I did not.
I really wish I was making that up.
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
Should we go get some celebratory "I'm not pregnant" tacos?
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
Im going to the gym...covered in the Brazilians cum
And how is that different than any other weeknight in your world
Randomize
