her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
I woke up to a topless girl handing me a blunt. Candidate for greatest wake-up ever?
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
Once the overwhelming "oh god my crotch is on fire" wears off, that excite stuff is really nice
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
Randomize
