What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
You threw up in a Dixie cup last night. Oddly, you just gained major points in my book for that.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
If your boss lets you sleep on his couch, you don't pay him back by boning his daughter.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Randomize
