i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I'm sitting by the window waiting for the sun to go down so that I can start drinking.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Just set the kids up with doughnuts downstairs so I could go up and masturbate uninterrupted. I am such a good mom.
Randomize
