just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
Sam from lord of the rings is 10 yards away from me, i am creaming myself.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
We laughed. We cried. We came everywhere.
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
Randomize
