So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
my periods are so regular now that they are sync-ed with my subscriptions of vogue.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
Randomize
