Just mADE A PArabola og urine
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
Don't linger or you will get sucked into spending the night. Remember the mission mantra: GET OFF
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
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