she was definitely wearing a bumpit. i think it was the hollywood bumpit. i told her that i lived with my parents to get outta taking her home.
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
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it was like, one of those nights where you keep going back to the fridge because you just can't get full. except, with sex.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
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This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
On a brief change if topic, last night I dreamt I got shit faced with bill Nye the science guy and we went bar to bar and explained the science of alcohol to everyone who'd give us free drinks. We wore bow ties
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