I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
Sarah was butt-chugging wine and diarrhea'd all over the wall
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
I woke up and there was a tiny sombrero on my penis. Care to explain?
Shame - the story of my life.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
