Last night I went to an anything but cups party. I took a hummingbird feeder. It was a terrible decision.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
Update: I spent 10 minutes trying to fish out a rogue vagina weight.
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
Randomize