You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
Totalylr drunk. Coveredc in cryola marker. Loving it. Straight men everywhere. Don't be surprises when I'm pregbat romorrowwwww
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
all the one night stand stories i have end with me crying on my RA's floor stuffing cupcakes into my mouth
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize
