So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.
ummmm thanks
Randomize
