elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
How the fuck can he download so much porn but not know how to find the Skype app?
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
The only reason you haven't shit yourself yet is because you don't like having fun.
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
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