I think i just called up my ex and talked to her for 20 minutes about frogs and how happy i am to be wearing shorts
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
bikini waxes are so much more painful when you know you're not getting laid
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Randomize