what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
No, he's fine. He only wanted to know why there were traffic pylons in the living room and how the peanut butter got on the ceiling.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
He was singing Justin Beiber while we did it. I love secure Spanish men
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
He told me I have nice nipples. You can't just tell someone that and then leave the state!
My vagina is officially offended.
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
