I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
