people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
I found your dream girl. She looked 11 but drove and on her key chain it said "if i am not wasted the day is"
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vagina has a heartbeat. That means I'm in love, right?
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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