Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
I now beleive the Trojan Ecstasy ad "feels like nothing's there". They forgot to add "...cause the condom broke."
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
my favorite part of the night was when I was in the bathroom frantically trying to get my cat whiskers and nose off to make hooking up less awkward
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Until they make a bed that bathes you in your sleep, I will not be satisfied.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I believe in weed hangovers. To say the least.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
We need to feng shui this bitch.
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