47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
it's like a replay of two fridays ago...except not in a motel and i'm not having sex in the shower.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
A girl in McDonalds just asked if I was in here wasted a few nights ago throwing fries at the staff, I said it was my twin
We both know that wasn't me
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
Randomize
